Fractured Bible Tales

Fractured Bible Tales…

“Moses to be indicted for Murder. Exodus Postponed.”

“Abraham indicted in attempted Murder. Child Might be taken away here is what you need to know…”

“On first try Jesus turns water into vinegar. Tries Again. A lesson in persistence.”

“Apostles hate dirty jobs follow cult master.”

“Lord what about my boat payment?”

And then Mary looked at Saint Joseph and said, “Look Joseph-I outrank you. I repeat I outrank you. Mother of God. Mother of God.

What don’t you get?”

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After Jesus stopped his forty day fast he returned home rent free to eat some rugalach and matzo ball soup and sing Dayenu and Kumbaya with his mother and father and John the Baptist, Joachim and Saint Anne …
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Always surprised me that Jesus, Mary and Joseph never seem to be together and yet in the Catholic Religion we reflect on them as the Holy Family.

So I was thinking about the resurrection… And imagined what if Jesus held a press conference on the day he rose from the dead. Wouldn’t that have solved a lot of disbelief?

FRACTURED BIBLE TALES.

And then Jesus fed the 5 thousand and also the 94 vegans, who requested Tofu Lite.